My First Buddhist Retreat – Day 3: 7-25-10

Sunday

Ugh — today is sooo sluggish. All I want is sleep! My roomies are early birds. They were up BEFORE the bell. (Bell rings at 6am – this time I actually heard the bell as I was already awake.)

We broke the rules by whispering in the kitchen. It’s a HUGE kitchen! We don’t know how all the things work in there!

It’s another rainy day. Which is fine by me. Yesterday was hot for that outdoor walking meditation. I’m going to skip it today. I kept falling asleep during meditation afterwards.

Now it’s sunny again. I got my stuff mostly packed. I planned on doing that at the 2pm walking meditation, but I want to get it all together while I’m still able to move around.

Almost time to head back up for teaching/meditation.

One thing I learned from last night, for sure, is Anam is just a guy. That’s it. Which is really all he is saying. “Hey, I’m just a guy – you can do this too!” That, to me, is more authentic than most of these folks here could ever dream of being.

Finished lunch — Pizza! O my god! These people know how to cook! Everything is just so delicious. I wish they could come home & cook all my meals!

This mornings teachings were spot on. He practically named me as someone who profoundly effected him this weekend! Someone who was dying told him they want to live the rest of their lives with awareness. Unless one of the other 3 people were dying, who else can it be? I made sure to listen & not fall asleep.

I just got yelled at for turning the lights on while I snapped a pic on my phone.

My space at Stillwood 1

My space at Stillwood 2

 

THESE WERE TAKEN WITH THE LIGHTS OFF

Well, gees, didn’t hear me complain when you guys woke me up so early. OK so clearly I have some more work to do here. Today is my last day.

This evening we’re having people “Take Refuge.” I think I will do it.

Look up book: Taming the Tiger Within by Thich Nat Hanh — great quotes about death – would like for funeral.

I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna vow to be one with the light  — oh wait — I don’t think I have that correct.  I’m taking refuge. Dedicating myself to moving ahead to find awareness & pass it on.

I did it! I vowed to practice non-violence, to be true to the dharma & commit to the sangha. Or… you should just probably read this Refuge in the Three Jewels. I cried during the ceremony. I opened my heart to let it all in.

This is the last night! I hope I get time to actually speak to some of these people. (Mostly ladies.)

I can’t stop coughing now. Great. The head lama (Ani Trime) just handed me a cough drop. It’s cherry. Bleh. I didn’t know those robes had pockets!

I finally asked about the Prayer Wheel! What a nice idea! Thanks, Larry for the talk!

Well that was pretty much it for my journal (Thanks, Lynne!) After the last meditation session we were all able to talk again so us weekenders could say our goodbyes. It was funny to be talking again and Wendi & I could finally hang out and chat. She stayed the whole week. Maybe next time I could too.

Everyone was so incredibly helpful. Sue brought my bags to my car. Larry had wrapped a gift for me to take back home. It was a beautiful Tibetan mat with with, I think, the silver plate and scissors used in the ceremony. Wendi walked me to my car. So nice and peaceful.

Of course then I made a wrong turn (it was dark when I left) and was lost for 30 mins in the dark forest. I stuck it together and did not panic. Finally I saw NEWARK! I knew I was safe. Who knew Newark was so big? I’d only been to Tom Wahl’s! Once I saw the Tom Wahl’s sign I knew I was on my way home.

So exhausted after a weekend of meditation!

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